I was watching Super Nanny a few years ago and there was this family with a totally disobedient child. He was abusive to his parents by yelling and screaming and hitting everybody in sight. This kid was 6 years old and I thought to myself...wow what kind of parents would let their kid be like that!
Until I was a parent myself I really didn't understand the determination and independence that a toddler tries to figure out. It amazes me at how a child can concentrate so hard and keep trying until they figure out whatever they are trying to do. Their frustration comes out by crying when something they want to do doesn't work and all smiles when it goes their way. My daughter is 3 (almost 4 years old) and the most determined little girl I know! She will get so frustrated when something isn't working and come running to either me or my husband for help. We will show her and if it is still frustrating her after we have shown her how to do something, we will get her to take a breath and try to work through the problem until she figures it out herself. We are doing this to try and help develop her problem solving skills.
We have had our ups and downs and last Saturday I thought that we could have been on one of those reality shows that have children acting out in the most crazy ways that the parents need someone to come in to help with the discipline. My daughter was happliy having her bath and when it was her time to come out she told me to "get out". Well, this did not go over well with a very tired mum and I picked her up right out of the tub and carried this naked, screaming and squirming little girl to her room. As calmly as I could and not saying a thing (all the while thinking.,,who is this demon child) I got her dried off and dressed and put her into bed. The next thing I knew after closing her door and walking downstairs to do the dishes, I hear screaming for "daddy" and she was either kicking or hitting the wall. (without a video monitor I really can't tell). When she didn't get the attention she was after she moved to hitting the door with both fists and still screaming. My husband then took control of the situation and went upstairs to deal with this demon child.
I felt terrible but totally spent...I now know how those reality TV parents felt, and how easily one can be driven to drink. This only happened one time, but when the saying goes the "terrible twos" I think the person had the age wrong. It is the terrible three's. The toddler is trying to figure out her independence and when they don't get it all hell breaks loose. This is also the time when most kids drop naps altogether, but are still in need of one. That's another topic...how to get a toddler to nap when they need to. My daughter has dropped all naps and once in a blue moon will actually take one, and on this particular day she really needed a nap!
I am crossing my fingers that this doesn't happen again,